


Recovery

by Wingzeroalchemist



Series: Re-take [1]
Category: RWBY
Genre: Abandonment Issues, Angst, But actual recovery, Gen, Physical Disability
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-08-07
Updated: 2018-09-13
Packaged: 2019-06-23 10:30:11
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 9
Words: 8,861
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15604338
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Wingzeroalchemist/pseuds/Wingzeroalchemist
Summary: It's not easy getting back up after losing a part of yourself. Yang has a long road ahead to heal both her body and her mind. A few insults from your dad and a prosthetic don't make a recovery.





	1. Nightmare Pt. 1

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> More explanation at the end, but in short I wrote this after being dissatisfied with Yang's 'arc' in Volume 4 and while I was in a dark place. I wrote these in short snippets and not necessarily in order, though I will post them in order.
> 
> Constructive criticism is welcome, particularly on grammar and spelling.

She was there again. That burning room. Blake lay prone on the floor with that monster standing above her. Fear and panic consumed her. She had to save her. He was going to kill her, she had to get to her NOW!  
  
But as she leaped, she knew what was coming. What always came. The flash. The burning pain. That disgusting grin. Then the fall. But unlike that night, and like every night since, she wasn't given the benefit of unconsciousness. She could only lay there, useless and unable to move, forced to watch him step towards Blake and finish what he started.  
  
She tried to scream, to move, to do anything, but she was frozen. Her body wouldn't budge. She couldn't even look away as he brought down his blade. Slowly he turned to face her, and though she could not see his eyes behind the mask, she could feel his monstrous gaze. She knew what came next. He stood before her and lifted his blade high, she could only watch as he brought it down to-  
  
Yang's eyes flew open as she bolted upright, her heart beating as if trying to escape her chest. Tears were already falling as she instinctively reached with both hands to grab her pillow, only to fall short and almost drop it. Pulling it to her face, she let out a muffled scream. Pain seared through where her right arm should be, and she reached her left hand around the pillow in her face to grasp tightly to what was left. She hated this. Hated these constant nightmares, hated this pain, hated the overwhelming fear. But most of all, she hated her own uselessness.  
  
Terrified and worthless, it's no wonder everyone always left her. Why shouldn't they? Especially now, when she couldn't even fight. The thing she prided herself in most, and now it was gone. Yang Xiao Long was a fighter, and a damn good one. But the frightened girl who sat here now was just a cripple. Useless and afraid.  
  
And so she cried. Softly as she could, she sobbed into her pillow wishing she could just disappear.  
  
However, she was soon interrupted by a soft whine. Raising her head, she could make out a fluffy black and white shape through the darkness and tears. Zwei looked at her with worried eyes, standing on his hind legs with his front paws on her bed. He whined again before leaping into the bed and pressing as close to her side as possible with his face in her lap. Looking back up, he continued to gaze at her, his eyes filled with concern.

  
Setting down her pillow behind her, Yang started to pet him with her remaining hand. As she did, she began to whisper.  
  
"Why won't it go away, Zwei? Why can't I just sleep?"  
  
Still whispering, her voice took on a harder tone.  
  
"I'm so sick of it, all of it. Sick of being left behind, sick of being afraid, sick of being useless."  
  
She hiccuped, hand ceasing its movement to rest on her other knee. Yang bowed her head, scrunching her eyes tight in a useless attempt to stave off the tears. Finally, voice almost inaudible, she choked out,  
  
"I don't even know who I am anymore."  
  
Zwei whined again, licking her hand before pressing his nose against it. He moved forward, pressing more of his body against her front as if to assure her he was there. Yang wrapped her arm around him and held him close, crying softly into his neck.  
  
The two stayed like that for what felt like hours, until at last the tears slowed to a stop and they both drifted off into a quiet sleep.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As I said above, I wrote this in a dark place as a sort of therapy. Like Yang I had my own mental and physical recovery to go through, though not quite as drastic. But as we see at the beginning of White Trailer "Everyone is entitled to their own sorrow, for the heart has no metrics or form of measure. And all of it... irreplaceable."
> 
> I initially kept this between people I trusted because it was rather personal, but I feel I'm in a better place now and ready to share. This is also a sort of prequel to a version of the Haven finale I'd been working on since V5E1, though real life has been quite distracting. I'm hoping this will help me keep chugging and finish before Volume 6 premiers.
> 
> I'll release all I have in regular intervals, and will add any new snippets I write if I feel the need.
> 
> Thanks to KnightOfAshes, Kuchenjaeger, and LilGlitteringStar for bearing with me through these.


	2. The Nightmare Pt. 2: Morning Walk

Yang’s eyes fluttered as sunlight from the window fell on her face. As she groggily opened her eyes, her half-asleep brain took notice of a few things. First, there was a warm, fluffy pillow pressed against her chest. Second, her eyes and cheeks felt crusty. As her mind started catching up and the furry pillow started wiggling the events of last night came back to her. Surprisingly, she felt a lot better. The hurt was still there, but it felt muted. Or as if she had more energy to hold up the burden.

 

Yang felt the wiggling ramp up and she looked down just in time to see Zwei’s face pop out from under the sheets. All of the previous wiggling seemed to have been concentrated into his rump now, as he had started frantically wagging his entire backside, stubby tail actually pulling down the sheets by the sheer force of the movement. Zwei looked her in the eyes for a few moments before giving a low bark and licking Yang in the face.

 

“Ewww!”

 

Yang jokingly shrieked, smile breaking out across her face as she laughed and wiped off Zwei’s good morning ‘kiss’.

 

As she finished wiping and the laughter died down, Yang looked back down at Zwei, now completely free from the sheets he had pulled off the bed with the sheer power of his booty shaking. Her small smile grew a bit wider and she softly pat his head.  
  
“Thanks for being there for me, boy. I really needed that,” she gently said. As she scratched his neck, her fingers brushed over his collar, giving her an idea.

 

“I’ve got it. How about I take you for a walk as a thank you?” Yang asked.

 

Yang didn’t think it was possible, but Zwei’s tail began to wag even harder. She was slightly worried he’d wag his tail right off his butt at this rate.

 

“Let me just go get ready, and we’ll head out.”

 

Before she finished her last word Zwei had already bolted out of the room to do whatever combat corgis do to get ready for the day. By the time she had brushed her teeth, washed her face, and gotten dressed he was already waiting for her at the door, leash in his mouth. He didn’t really need a leash, but for some reason he liked using it. Yang always thought it was so he could pull on whoever was holding it. Hooking the leash on the eager dog, Yang and Zwei headed out, the canine already tugging to sniff things and bark at squirrels.

 

As they walked, Yang’s thoughts turned to last night, or rather how she felt this morning after the events of last night. Normally she felt beyond miserable the mornings after nights like those. She was tired of nights like that and the normal mornings that followed. She wanted to wake up feeling like this everyday.

 

Looking over at Zwei bouncing and barking happily Yang realized this is the first time she’d left the house since coming home. A small sense of fear crept up the back of her mind, but it was squashed by a feeling of accomplishment. She’d left the house. She’d gotten up and done something on her own. Yang grabbed hold of this feeling with this morning’s energy and embraced it tightly. She wasn’t useless. She’d taken a step towards being ‘normal’. Which meant she could take another. And another. She could have a life. This realization struck her like a lightning bolt, stopping her in her tracks midstep.

 

She looked at her left hand, then at what was left of her right. It’d be a lot of work. She’d have to relearn to do most things one handed. Some doors were probably closed to her now too. But it would be better than how she had been. Yang clenched her left hand, feeling a twinge of pain from where she felt her right should be. She’d said she hated feeling useless, worthless, abandoned and weak. So she’d change that. Not for anyone else, she was done being hurt and used. She’d rebuild her life and do it for herself, for her own happiness. Not Ruby’s, not her dad’s, not her uncle’s, not Weiss’, not Bl-... Not for anyone else. This time, she was going to take care of herself. And she was going to do it on her own. She didn’t need Raven, Ruby, Summer, or… or anyone else. She’d be strong and happy without them.

 

A soft whine and a paw on her leg snapped her back to reality. She looked down to see Zwei giving her a worried look. ‘Right,’ she thought, ‘It’ll start here, and Zwei can be the exception.’

 

“I’m fine boy,” Yang said, smile growing on her face again, “But I had an idea. How about we make this a daily thing? I’m gonna get back on my feet again, wanna help me make sure these legs are strong enough?”

 

Zwei’s ears perked up and he smiled in the way only corgis can. Barking excitedly, the happy hound started running around Yang in circles, wrapping her legs with the leash in the process.

 

Yang laughed and spun around, having experience with this before. But Zwei was just too fast, supercharged with excitement. Letting go of the leash before he tripped her, Yang chased him in circles. It only took a few moments before her weeks of inactivity became apparent and her legs gave out on her. She managed to catch herself with her left arm, only slipping slightly when she tried to use both. Pushing herself into a seated position, Yang glared down at what was left of her missing arm, and rather than being overcome with sadness she felt only a sense of anger. Anger she could use. She’d let it push her forward now, rather than hold her back.

 

Yang turned to look at Zwei, who watched her with a concerned expression. When he saw her face, his ears perked up and his tail wagged.

 

“So I guess that’s another thing to add to the list of things to relearn, how to fall.”

 

“Bark!”

 

“Right, and to get my legs back under me. Thanks boy.”

 

Slowly getting to her feet, she bent down and picked up his leash again.

 

“Now how about we finish that walk. And this time, no trying to trip me.”

 

“Bark!”


	3. Days Like This

Yang hated days like this. Days when miserable was too weak a word. Days when it felt like nothing she’d done amounted to anything. Every dark thought, every painful memory, all the pain, anger, fear, and self-loathing; everything hitting her all at once. Days where all she wanted to do was curl up into a ball and disappear, or better yet, to have never been born at all. And even worse, rather than being able to use it to motivate herself all it did was leave her feeling drained and numb. Empty. Yang hated days like this.

 

The day had started normal enough. Yang had woken up and taken Zwei for his morning walk, not even needing his ‘help’ getting out of bed this time. She’d eaten breakfast and started doing her chores and it seemed like today was going to be another day moving forward. But while sweeping the porch Yang’s drifting thoughts had spiraled out of control and the weight of it all hit her like a freight train. It felt like her mental floodgates had broken open and she was swept away by despair.

 

When Yang had first woken up from that night, she had nothing but days like this. But as she worked hard to get back on her feet, these days happened less and less. Which made it that much more disheartening when they hit.

 

Barely holding back tears, she forced herself to finish her chores. The sense of accomplishment afterwards that she had come to rely on was absent, instead it all felt pointless. But Yang had promised her dad she would do them, and it was much easier to force herself to do things if it was an obligation to someone else. Because why should she feel obligated to do something for herself if she felt she was worthless? Why else would everyone abandon her?

 

After finishing, Yang skipped lunch and headed straight to her room, telling Taiyang that she wasn’t feeling well. A quick glimpse of her eyes was all he needed, and he gave her a look of understanding before nodding.

 

Reaching her room, Yang stripped of her jacket before crashing into her bed, hugging her pillow as hard as she could with her remaining arm. She buried her face and let the tears flow freely, occasionally letting out a quiet sniffle or tiny choked gasp. She didn’t wail or sob. She simply lacked the energy.

 

Yang hated days like this. She spent hours in that position, occasionally dozing lightly when she ran out of tears, or just staring blankly at the wall over the edge of her pillow.

 

By the time dusk had fallen, Yang had somewhat regained her composure, though she felt horrible and incredibly thirsty. As she slowly shambled downstairs to get a glass of water she smelled her dad cooking something, but the thought of food made her nauseous. Taiyang had anticipated this and had a bowl of soup prepared, kept warm sitting on the stove. The soup wasn’t thick, but it somewhat filled her belly and she managed to keep it down. She’d been through this song and dance enough to know that foregoing food would just make things worse, no matter how hard it was to get down. And she was proven right by the time she got back upstairs and started brushing her teeth, already feeling slightly better.

 

Despite spending most of the day in bed, Yang felt exhausted. As she lay down to go to sleep, she felt her fire start to flicker again. Just a spark, but it was something. This was a setback, but she vowed to herself that that’s all it would be. Tomorrow she’d get back on her feet, and get even further. For every one step back she’d move two steps forward. She’d grow stronger with each step, and with every step she’d stumble less and less, until eventually, someday, these days might stop for good. Because Yang hated days like this. But she wouldn’t let them stop her anymore. 


	4. How to Fall

Today was the day. Yang could feel it. Today was the day she was going to take the next step.

The blonde held onto that thought as she washed her face and brushed her teeth. She repeated it over and over as she got into her running clothes and put her hair in a ponytail. And she kept it at the forefront of her mind as she walked down the stairs and put on Zwei’s leash. Finally, as she stepped out onto the porch, she spoke the mantra aloud.

“Today is the day.”

She would make this happen. Last night had been a bad one, but she was determined to succeed today in spite of that. Yang would take that indignation and put it to use.

Taking a deep breath, she let out some of the tension as she exhaled. Yang looked down to her fluffy partner and smiled.

“Today’s the day, boy. You ready to run?”

Zwei had been watching his human with doggy apprehension as she psyched herself up, his eyes full of concern. But as her shoulders relax and she looked to him, he met her smile with a big corgi grin of his own. If Warm Fluffy Human was ready for this, than he’d be with her every step of the way.

Yang’s smile grew when Zwei barked an affirmative. “Alright then. Let’s go.”

Taking her first steps off the porch slow, the blonde tried to find her stride.

Breathe in. Breathe out. In. Out.

Not bothering to keep track of time, Yang did her best to keep focused on her footsteps and her breathing. It took a bit of time to get into balanced rhythm. She stumbled more than a few times as she tried to compensate for the significant change in her center of gravity. Unfortunately, relearning to walk hadn’t translated well to running while missing 8 pounds on her right side. But eventually she managed to get into a steady jog.

Out of the corner of her eye she observed Zwei keeping pace with her, his stubby little legs bouncing him along without difficulty. She noticed he didn’t bother taking in the scenery like he usually did, instead switching his focus between keeping an eye on her and watching where he was going.

It was sweet, but it also nagged at her. She was getting better. She was hurt, but she wasn’t glass. The indignation from last night’s nightmare began to creep back up. Not at Zwei. Never at Zwei.

But she wasn’t the fragile wounded girl she was before. And she needed to nip that thought in the bud before it plagued her with doubts.

With a grunt, she started to pick up speed. She’d been handling that pace well enough, she could afford to give it a bit more umph.

Zwei barked, partly in warning, partly in excitement. He sped up as well, indulging himself in the thrill of the chase. He couldn’t be there for his human if he let her get away, could he?

Yang’s lungs were starting to burn now. Her legs screamed, her side stung, and she loved it. The adrenaline rushed through her system and she craved more. This wasn’t enough. This wasn’t even close to her old running speed. She could do better.

She’d gotten overeager.

It hadn’t taken much, just a slightly uneven curve on the path. One she’d managed countless times before the incident. Easy for a runner with both arms. For someone with a normal center of gravity.

Yang’s foot slipped from beneath her as she tripped, bringing her hurtling face first towards the unforgiving ground. She almost reached out with both arms. Almost. Instead, she loosened as much of her body as possible and tucked in her head. Bringing in her left arm further inwards, she pulled what remained of her right under her left hand and hit the ground on her left side. Upon meeting the ground she rolled from her left bicep to her shoulder, taking care to avoid the elbow, then continued from her left shoulder to her right hip.

She let out an ‘oof’ as her butt made contact with the dirt, not even bothering to follow through back to her feet. The blonde wasn’t entirely sure her legs would support her at the moment, anyway.

Yang was content to lie there gasping for air as Zwei scrambled over to her side. He whined and licked her face, urging her to give some sort of response to let him know she was okay. The fluffy canine was rewarded with a lazy wave of the blonde’s left arm.

“I’m alive. I’m alive.” Yang managed to get out. Zwei stepped back at that and waited for her to catch her breath.

When her heart rate calmed from 'machine gun on speed' down to a more reasonable hummingbird level, she spoke.

“I’m okay, boy. Just a little tumble. And a nice reminder of why I prefer Summer.”

Zwei tilted his head and let out a confused noise. At his unspoken question, Yang continued.

“Why? Cause Fall hurts.” She managed a smug grin and a finger gun before she was wracked with gasping coughs for air once more.

Zwei’s ears dropped and he chuffed, before turning around and using his hind legs to kick up leaves at the prone human.

“Heeeey!” Yang protested between raspy coughs.

The unamused corgi relented, turning back to look at his human again. After a moment’s deliberation he waddled over to where she lay and sat down next to her, alert eyes roaming the surrounding area.

 

They stayed there for about five minutes as Yang caught her breath until she could finally feel her legs again. Shakily getting to her feet, the teen looked down at her furry companion.

“Let’s say we head back at a nice, slow walk?”

Zwei let out a bark of affirmation, waiting to start until Yang began to slowly, very slowly, walk back to the house.


	5. The Arm

It was actually a beautiful piece of hardware, if she was being honest.

 

Yang sat in contemplative silence, staring at the prosthetic limb, in the same position she’d been in for the past few hours.

 

Could use a different color though. Plain silver-gray seemed a bit boring.

 

Yang let the thoughts come and go. They were far more pleasant that the ones she’d been avoiding.

 

_It wouldn’t be the real thing._

 

Yeah, like that one.

 

Yang reached across her chest with her left hand to grab what was left of her right.

 

On the one hand, the idea of having two hands again was too good to be true. She’d resigned herself to being like this forever, to making the most of it, and now she could be whole again.

 

Only, would she really? It wasn’t her arm. It’d never be _her_ arm. It was cold. It looked lifeless.

 

She sighed.

 

On the other hand, she’d gotten used to having no other hand. She wasn’t the Yang Xiao Long she was before. Would she be that Yang again? Would she be the same Yang she was now?

 

The thought scared her. Truly scared her. And suddenly the arm didn’t look so beautiful. It looked menacing. Inhuman. Would that be her?

 

She’d had nightmares. Of putting on the arm and being consumed by it. Of becoming less than human.

 

Her left hand’s grip tightened until it was almost painful.

 

Yang’s eyes narrowed. She’d wanted to get stronger, to get back on her feet and live her life. This would help her do that. This arm would open those doors she thought closed.

 

She was the same Yang that’d made that promise to herself that morning.

 

Finally taking her eyes off the prosthetic, she looked down at what was left of her right arm. Letting go, she held her left hand in front of her. She felt her shoulders tense as she tightened that hand into a fist.

 

And she was also the same Yang that’d fought in the Battle of Beacon. The one who, according to Ironwood, had earned that arm.

 

Yang rose from where she sat on her bed, ignoring the tingling in her legs. Walking over to the arm, she picked it up and held it towards the window, the moonlight glistening across its exterior.

 

It really was a beautiful piece of hardware.

 

She lined it up with her right limb, then slowly slid the prosthetic on.

 

One more step forward.


	6. Again

"ARRRGH!"

Yang screamed as the heavy bag slammed into her again. She'd lost count of how many times she had failed to keep her rhythm and had the bag hit her back for her mistake.

In fury she reached back with her new right fist, aiming to hit the bag with everything her new arm was capable of, but she stopped. She'd been in this position before. And all she'd accomplished was ruining another bag. She didn't have that many left.

Yang sighed, and took a deep breath. 

"Okay, one more go."

Again, Yang began her set. And again, she missed her rhythm. 

But she'd gotten in a few more punches than last time. A small smile graced Yang's face. It was progress, however small, and she'd keep focus on that. 

"Again."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Adding this one one the same day since the last one was so short.


	7. Why

Yang was sitting motionless on the couch when Tai came back from town, staring at that photo of Team RWBY. She didn't remember when she'd first sat down, or how long she'd been sitting, before she was pulled from her thoughts by the shifting weight of the couch as Tai sat down next to her.

 

For a few minutes neither said a word. Yang continued staring and Tai looked down at his feet. Finally, Yang broke the silence.

 

“Why did she leave?”

 

She asked softly. Tai lifted his head to look at her, though she kept her eyes on the photo. He said nothing, waiting for her to continue.

 

“Why am I always left behind?” 

 

She sniffed, closing her eyes and bowing her head. Her voice began to waver.

 

“First Raven leaves. Then Mom. Then Blake. Then Ruby. Am I not worth staying for? Did I do something wrong?”

 

She tried to say something more, but was forced to choke back a sob before trying again.

 

“I tried. I tried to be there for her. I tried to help her feel happy, to feel safe. I did my best. I would have done anything for her. And then she ran. When I needed her most, she just ran!”

 

She raised her voice at the last few words, clenching her fists as a few tears began to trickle down her cheeks. Her voice was hoarse as she struggled to get the next words out.

 

“It hurts.”

 

Tai sighed softly. He reached out and gently rest his hand on her back, taking a brief moment to choose his next words carefully. 

 

“I get the feeling you're not talking about Ruby.”

 

Yang sniffed, but said nothing.

 

Her dad gave a small hum of acknowledgement and began to slowly rub small circles on her back.

 

“I wish I had the answers for you. I don't know why they left, why people choose to leave. I assume they have their own reasons, but I know that doesn't make it any better.”

 

He took his hand off of her back and wrapped it around her shoulders, pulling her into a hug.

 

“But I know that you  _ are _ worth staying for. You are worth loving. You burn brighter than anyone else, and have so much compassion and love in your heart. You give everything that you have, which is why it hurts so much.”

 

Yang finally couldn't hold back any longer, and buried her face into his neck as she was racked with heavy sobs. 

 

Tai paused and began to pet her hair.

 

“I can't promise everything will work out. But I will promise you this. For as long as I live, I will always be here for you, for as long as you need me. I will always,  _ always _ love you, just like I know that Ruby and Summer love you. And if Blake has any sense at all, then so does she.”

 

The teen gave another sniffle.

 

“Then why did she leave?”

 

Tai sighed. 

 

“I don't know. People do things for all sorts of reasons. We can’t control that.”

 

He put his hands her shoulders and pushed her back to look her in the eyes.

 

“But you do control what you do next, where you go from here. It's on you to figure out how you can make peace with this.”

 

Yang broke eye contact and looked down, taking the chance to rub her eyes.

 

“I don't know if I can forgive her.”

 

“I didn't say anything about forgiveness.”

 

The blonde looked up at his words. On his face was one of the most serious expressions she'd ever seen her father make.

 

“It’s up to you, and only you, to decide whether or not you forgive her. Forgiveness can only come from you, and only if you feel it's worth giving. No one else has any right to tell you otherwise. It isn't easy, and it can be a long process if you choose to try. Some things don't deserve forgiveness.”

 

His face softened, and he gave a small smile.

 

“If the day comes where you see her again, you do what you feel is right, what you feel you can do and still live with yourself afterwards. Whatever you choose, I'll support you.”

 

The blonde teen stared at her father, looking for any signs of deceit, but deep down she already knew she wouldn't find any. Whatever may happen, her dad was here. While it didn't make the hurt go away, it was a comfort. One she clung to as tight as she could. 

 

Yang threw herself forward into another hug, holding on to her dad like a lifeline. 

 

Tai wrapped his arms around his sunny little dragon, holding her close as the dam broke down completely, and she wept for everything she'd held in for so long. 

 

She cried for the mother who abandon her and the woman she never knew. She cried for the mom who had loved her, stolen from her and leaving her to pick up the pieces. She cried for the childhood she'd sacrificed, holding the home together as she bottled up her own grief. She cried for the loss of her friends, taken before their time. She cried for the loss of herself, the part of her that could never be replaced. She cried for her sister who'd left her. The sister who she feared she'd never see again to tell her she loved her. She cried for her partner who she'd laid her heart bare for, and who'd ran when she needed her most. 

 

She cried until she could cry no longer. 

 

Finally, exhausted and with no more tears to shed, she drifted off to sleep. 


	8. The Mask

Coming home from her morning walk with Zwei, Yang opened the door to find her dad quickly throwing things into a duffel bag. The bag he took with him on Hunts. Tai answered her question before she opened her mouth.

 

"Yang, I have to go out today. There's been reports of a small surge in Grimm activity over in the Western Woods. It might be a day or two depending on how bad it is, so you're going to be on your own. You're up to that, right?"

 

Yang furrowed her brow, "Wait, you're going on your own? Not even taking Zwei?"

 

Tai looked at her with a small grin, "What, think your old man is too rusty to take on a few Grimm by himself?"

 

Yang snorted. "No, but things have gotten really bad recently. You said it yourself, even with the Huntsmen spread so thin they're advising no one go on solo missions. Things are so chaotic, and with the CCT down you won't even be able to let anyone know if something goes wrong." Yang's voiced lowered to a whisper and her eyes fell to the floor, "I don't know if I could handle it if you left me too, Dad."

 

Tai paused before standing and walking over to Yang. He pulled her into a gentle hug. "Hey, it's okay. I'm not going anywhere for a long time. This old dragon still has some fight in him. So don't worry about it, okay?"

 

Yang nodded into his shirt. They stood like that for a moment before separating on some unspoken cue. Yang looked back up at her dad before she spoke. "So why is it just you? Isn't there someone at Signal who you could buddy up with? Or even Zwei?"

 

Tai shook his head. "Everyone at Signal is already out. Even the campus itself is being taken care of by the older students. As for Zwei," He looked down at the combat corgi, who stared right back before letting out an indignant huff. Tai looked back up at his eldest, "Well, I figured he was doing you more good here." The unspoken words were obvious in his voice. 'I wanted someone here to protect you.'

 

Yang felt a surge of indignation begin to rise before dying as quickly as it came. He was right. Even after putting on the new arm, she hadn't gone into any real combat since Beacon. Sparring with her dad, helpful as it was, wasn't the same as dealing with monsters that were actually intent on killing you. Grimm or human.

 

"Take me with you," she said softly.

 

Tai had already gone back to packing his bags when she spoke. He looked back up at Yang, the confusion apparent on his face. "What?"

 

"Take me with you," Yang said, voice much stronger this time. "I'll be your partner. And we can bring Zwei too."

 

Tai stared for a moment, choosing his words carefully. "You're positive you feel up to this? If it's just about the backup thing, I'll bring Zwei if it makes you feel better," he said in an even tone.

 

Yang nodded, "I'm sure. You said yourself that I'm back in fighting shape." Yang stopped and looked down, before reaching her right hand over to grab her left wrist. "I know I'm not okay. Not completely. But I need to do this. I need to make sure that I can still fight."

 

She looked back up. "Besides, you'll be there to watch my back. And like you said, it's just a few Grimm,” she said, her voice more light-hearted.

 

Zwei barked, miffed for being left out. Yang looked over and chuckled. "Right, and Zwei too. Sorry boy."

 

Zwei chuffed his acceptance to her apology before turning and running off to the back of the house, taking his leash with him.

 

Yang looked back to Tai who watched her with a raised eyebrow. He closed his eyes and sighed, then looked back up at her with a grin.

 

"Okay. As long as you're sure." He looked down at her hand, still clutching her left wrist. "Did Ember Celica work when you tested it the other day?" He asked suddenly.

 

Yang gave a little smirk, "Yep, working just fine. I built them to last."

 

Tai gave a chuckle and said, "Alright then, get your things, get Zwei, and we'll head out in 20."

 

Hearing a clinking noise they both looked to see Zwei coming back, leash gone, holding his flame proof collar in his mouth. The one the girls had affectionately called his "Fightin' Collar". Dropping it to the floor, Zwei gave an impatient "BARK" before picking his collar back up and bringing it to Tai's feet.

 

The two blondes chuckled as Tai reached down to change the collars and Yang headed off to get her things and change.

 

\---------------------

 

"Shit!" Tai shouted, blocking a blow from an Ursa. He grabbed the offending limb quicker than the beast could withdraw it and twisted. A 'crack' had the Grimm let out a cry between a roar and a whimper, which was then cut off as Tai used that arm to swing the Grimm over his shoulder. He slammed the Ursa down on two Beowolves that had been approaching them from behind, killing them and the Ursa instantly from the force of the slam.

 

The reports were way off. This was not just "a few" Grimm. This was an infestation. Tai didn't think there had ever been this many Grimm on the entire island before, let alone in one forest. Tai looked around, desperate to find Yang. They had been caught off guard by the sheer number and veracity of the Grimm and had been separated early on. He needed to find her, fast. This was too much for her first jump back into hunting. The sheer malice from the Grimm felt almost palpable.

 

Tai's eyes widened when heard a snarl from the north, one that couldn't possibly come from any Beowolf. Zwei. The dog had been with Yang when they separated. And there was no way any Grimm would separate that fluffy butt from his charge.

 

As he rushed to where he heard the snarl, Tai's path was cut off by another Beowolf. It roared in his face as it lunged forward. The furious father let out a roar of his own as he crushed the beast's skull with a haymaker to the side of the head. The Grimm slammed into a nearby tree, snapping it under the force of impact.

 

Not even bothering with the Creeps closing in from the sides, Tai sprinted in the direction of the snarling, which seemed to have gotten even louder and more frequent.

 

"Hold on, Yang."

 

\------------------

 

"E-YA!"

 

Yang shouted, launching off a Boartusk into a Beowolf with an Ember Celica boosted punch.

 

Out of the corner of her eye she saw another Beowolf coming in from her left, even as an Ursa came from the right. She heard a rustle and grinned, turning to face the Ursa. As the Beowolf closed in, a monochrome fluffball of rage slammed into it from the side. Zwei's small jaws snapped down on the Grimm's throat like a steel bear trap. Not letting go, Zwei used the momentum of the lunge and swung his weight from one side of the Grimm to the other, twisting the monster's throat almost 180 degrees before ripping it straight out. Zwei stuck the landing before spitting out the already dissolving Grimm flesh and turning to look at Yang.

 

As Zwei was showing the Beowolf who the top canine was, Yang faced down an Ursa half again the size of the ones she fought in the Emerald Forest. Her breathing was getting a bit shallow, the stress of the situation catching up on her. Unfortunately for the Grimm, the realization of this only served to piss her off. It reared back on its hind legs and opened its mouth to roar, but before it had even finished inhaling Yang was already right in front of it. The monster tried to snap its jaws on her but she ducked to the left, coming in too close for it to swipe down on her with it's massive claws. She cocked her left fist back and slammed it into the Ursa's side, quickly following with three more alternating blows before it could turn around, finishing with a left cross punctuated by the boom of Ember Celica. The blow forced the massive Grimm off balance, sending it stumbling back a few steps as it tried to get its feet back underneath it. Yang took a few running steps herself, leaping forward and slamming her new fist into its face. The Ursa's face caved in before the Grimm was launched backwards. It crashed straight through a tree before slamming into the base of another.

 

Hearing another rustle, Yang looked down to see Zwei at her side again. They felt more than heard the incoming attack as both dog and girl jumped to the side, needle sharp feathers piercing the ground where they had both been. Looking up they saw a massive Nevermore circling again for another attack. Yang and Zwei dashed into the more shaded trees to gain cover, narrowly avoiding even more deadly feathers.

 

Beneath a large oak, Yang looked down at Zwei. "I can't hit it from here. And I don't have any place high enough to jump from to get closer."

 

Zwei stared at her, before turning to face where he could hear the Nevermore and barked.

 

"Fastball Special?" Yang asked.

 

Zwei huffed and wiggled his tail a little.

 

"Alright then," Yang scooped him up and jumped up to the tallest tree with sturdy enough branches to hold them, "Hold on to your butt."

 

Zwei half lowered his ears and snorted.

 

Peeking out of the trees, Yang spotted the Nevermore before it could spot her. She cocked back her right arm, Zwei settling his rump into her palm. As she took aim, a panel on her right arm's forearm opened to reveal a gun barrel. Yang closed one eye and stuck her tongue out to the left as she got a lead on the target.

 

"Ready?"

 

"Bark!"

 

"FIRE!"

 

She flung Zwei forward like a rocket, his launch enhanced by a shot from the arm's cannon. The corgi rolled into a ball and looked to be set ablaze by the gunshot. As he spun, he homed in on the flying Grimm. The Nevermore didn't see the flaming furry missile until moments before impact, far too late to dodge. There was a boom, an indignant 'squawk', and an explosion of both feathers and flame. After a beat the Nevermore tumbled out of the cloud, still airborne, but its flying completely erratic.

 

Unfortunately Yang didn't get the chance to watch any further. Without warning the tree she was standing began falling beneath her. She jumped before it hit the ground, landing in a roll that smoothly transitioned into an upright boxer's stance. She turned to face what ruined her seat for the airshow and froze.

 

The mask. The flash of red. The burning in her right arm. Blackness.

 

Yang's eyes lost focus and she began hyperventilating as a massive Ursa Major, at least the size of a Deathstalker, slowly lumbered towards her.

 

That mask. Its face, it looked just like that mask. She was there again, in front of the monster. The glowing red eyes, glowing red hair, red blade. She didn't know what she was seeing anymore. All she felt was fear and pain and-

 

Tears started falling from her eyes as her body shook violently. She was helpless. Helpless in front of these monsters. Grimm, Adam, different names for the same evil. It all melted together and she couldn't think. Couldn't breathe. It was getting closer. Oh god it was getting closer.

 

Yang felt sick. Her arm was burning... She was burning.

 

She was burning. Yang could feel fire, rushing through her blood. She couldn't stop shaking, she felt paralyzed. But still the fire burned.

 

Her hair began to glow, her aura igniting as if her body itself had been set ablaze. The Grimm paused. The intelligence of its age urging caution.

 

'Enough.' The thought echoed through her mind. She would not sit here in fear. She would not be helpless again. Fear had taken control of her body, every cell was paralyzed, yet the fire only burned even stronger.

 

'Enough.' The thought was getting louder. She felt her muscles clench as her breathing became deeper, more aggressive. The flame growing hotter and hotter, an inferno spreading to every fiber of her being.

 

'Enough.' The thought was all consuming, roaring through her head with the force of a hurricane. The fire sung through her very soul.

 

"ENOUGH!" Yang roared. The inferno exploded from within her, given form by her Semblance, burning through the paralyzing grip that fear had on her. She would not let it hold her back anymore.

 

Yang’s Semblance engulfed her in swathes of flames, scorching the ground beneath her feet.

 

The Grimm’s patience had worn out and it roared, sprinting forward to kill its next victim.

 

Yang gave a roar of her own as she hurled herself forward to meet it with another explosion.

 

As they met, the great Ursa swiped at her with its massive claws. Faster than anything that size should be capable of, the claws whistled as they sliced through the air.

 

Yang dipped low into the inside of the Ursa’s arms, swinging back up to slam her left fist into the elbow. The flames of her Semblance set the Grimm’s fur ablaze, as the force of her punch blasted the forelimb of the Ursa right off its body.

 

The beast roared in agony, but pushed through its pain to bring its massive jaws down upon the Huntress as her back was turned.

 

Yang cocked back her right arm and crouched before jumping and firing from her new arm’s cannon. Faster than the Grimm could close its jaws, Yang shattered its teeth with her robotic elbow. Before gravity began to fully assert it’s hold, she reached up for the bone spikes on the Grimm’s armor and swung herself over, delivering an axe kick on the way down.

 

The Grimm’s head slammed into the ground as Yang jumped off and into a roll, putting some distance between her and the monster.

 

As she got to her feet she saw the Ursa doing the same. Its mask was slightly cracked, but the blow seemed to have only made it angrier.

 

Yang’s left hand began to shake. That mask. She was going to break that mask.

 

The fire roared through her with increased vigor, singing through her veins. The swathes of flames that surrounded her began to blossom out in waves.

 

The Grimm lumbered forward, unused to moving without its front leg.

 

Yang walked forward, matching its pace. She began to speed up, hitting a sprint as the beast got its stride and barreled towards her in a lumbering run of its own.

 

As they neared Yang fired her weapons behind her, launching herself forward as her feet skid across the ground. Before the Grimm began to rear back and raise its forelimb to strike, Yang slid right next to its face with her right arm already drawn back.

 

For an instant, Yang stared into those soulless glowing red eyes. She saw hatred. Malice. She saw the same things she saw that night at Beacon. Her eyes burned crimson.

 

Yang roared as she struck, fist catching fire before it made contact with the Grimm’s head.

 

There was a noise, but Yang didn’t hear it so much as she felt it in her bones. Time seemed to slow down as she watched a shockwave ripple from the point of impact throughout the Grimm’s body. And then it was over, as the force of the blow lifted the Grimm off the ground, its body tumbling lopsidedly.

 

It crashed with a ‘THWUMP’, flattening a few trees beneath it. After a beat it began to dissolve, the dust consumed by the flames still flickering on the corpse.

 

\----------

 

Tai caught sight of Yang when she fell from the tree. He began to panic when he saw her freeze up. And his panic became frenzied when what felt like every Grimm on the island stood between him and his daughter, seemingly intent on stopping him from getting to her at all cost. He tried to slide through, but he was knocked back by Boartusk. He attempted to go through the trees, but the Beowolves were in the trees too! So he fought. And fought and fought. Every Grimm killed seemed to bring two more, but he never took his eye off of his girl. His kills becoming quicker and brutal in their efficiency as his urgency grew.

 

Until finally he found a break in the horde. He lunged through the gap, stomping on a few Creeps that tried to block his path. They didn't get up again.

 

He made it to her side just as the Giant Ursa Major was dissolving. He had only seen one that large once before, and never this close to civilization. He was gobsmacked that she took it down, but that was quickly discarded as his concern for his daughter consumed everything.

 

"Yang! Oh honey, are you okay?"

 

He patted her down, not caring about the flaming Aura she gave off, nor giving any thought as to why it wasn't burning him.

 

Yang stared at the spot where what little was left of the Grimm still decayed. Tai noticed tears at the corners of her eyes, but also the small smile she had on her face.

 

"No, I'm not okay. But I'm getting there."

 

Tai sweeped her up into a bear hug and held her tight. As he turned, he saw the horde of Grimm he had just pushed through. And he noticed they had decided that they didn't appreciate him leaving early.

 

"That's good to hear, Yang. But I don't think they plan on waiting."

 

Yang turned to see where her dad was looking. Her eyes widened as she stepped away from Tai and took up her stance.

 

The Grimm began to close in faster as they saw the weary Huntsman and Huntress prepare for another round. At least until they caught sight of an approaching shadow on the ground. And it was getting larger.

 

A large black blur crashed onto the horde of Grimm, dust erupting from the ground from the force of the impact. When the dust had cleared, the horde was nowhere to be seen, and in their place was the now dissolving carcass of a particularly large Giant Nevermore. Some of the feathers rustled before a black and white fluffball tumbled out of them. The ball hit the ground and shook itself vigorously. With a muffled 'POMF' the fluffball smoothed down into the shape of a certain combat corgi.

 

Zwei barked excitedly as he ran back to meet his humans.

  


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So this one was my favorite to write for obvious reasons. But if you have any critiques or thoughts on it I'd love to hear them. I hope you enjoyed it.
> 
> I also want to mention that her freezing up was not a result of PTSD, but rather a panic attack caused from the pressure of the fighting while still not mentally ready, the feeling of malice from the Grimm, and finally just being triggered by the Grimm's mask looking like Adam's.


	9. The Letter

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is a sad one.

Yang sat at her desk, tongue sticking out slightly as she carefully moved pencil across paper with her new right hand. Over and over she wrote her name, trying to match her signature from some old paperwork she had found from Signal. Her new arm was pretty incredible, and since she’d put it on she’d been excited to try all the things she’d thought she’d never do again.

 

It’d taken a bit to start writing again, but she’d had the same problem in school after coming back from vacations, so it probably wasn’t the arm.

 

Unfortunately, Yang had never really been one for writing. She’d never had a diary or journal, nor did she write many letters. She never saw the need when the CCT let her send any kind of message over her Scroll. But now…

 

Her writing slowed to a stop. Now she didn’t even have anyone to write _to_. The blonde closed her eyes and sighed. So here she was, writing her name over and over again.

 

Yang didn’t know how long she sat there with her head bowed and eyes shut, before she finally raised her head and stood up. She walked over to the box where she had found the papers, hoping that maybe somewhere in there she’d find another idea. Something else to write, some other activity, just something productive to focus on. The box was mostly full of folders and binders. Paperwork, collections of old letters, some doodles from when the girls were little that her parents had promised they’d thrown away.

 

Her hand paused mid-motion as she was pulling out a binder of photos. Yang stared at the photo album for a few seconds before hesitantly setting it in her lap. She flipped through the pages, skimming through the pages before one caught her eye.

 

It was Summer, holding both a newborn Ruby and toddler Yang in her lap. The woman was tired, bags plainly visible under her eyes, but the pure happiness in her smile made it clear that the cause of her exhaustion was well worth it. Yang’s lips twitched in what was almost a smile.

 

Taking the album with her, Yang sat back down at her desk. After she placed the album in front of her, she pulled a fresh sheet of paper from under her current one and began to write.

 

_“Dear Mom”_

 

Yang scratched out the words as soon as she finished writing them. She then started again.

 

_“I miss you Mom. A lot has happened since I last spoke to you. I got a new arm, and so far it’s been mostly working out okay. I’m still walking Zwei in the morning and started sparring with Dad again. I’ve been working on Bumblebee too, doing some badly needed maintenance from being neglected for a while. I even fought some Grimm, including this massive Ursa. It was the biggest one I’ve ever seen! And you’ll be happy to hear that I’m eating my veggies. I hope you’re proud of me.”_

 

Yang paused again, the pencil frozen above where her next paragraph would start. She thought hard about what to say next, but the words began to just pour through her hand.

 

_“I’m really wish you were here. I could really do with your help or advice. Or to at least hear you say that it'll be okay and that I'll be able to handle it. Because I’m scared. I’m trying to be strong, I want to get back on my feet. I’m trying to convince Dad that I’m getting better so he doesn’t worry so much. I put on a strong face when Professors Port and Oobleck come over so they don’t pity me. But the truth is I’m really scared. I’m scared that I won’t get better. I’m scared I won’t be me anymore with this arm. I’m scared I’ll get hurt again. I’m scared of the monster that did this and of the nightmares. I’m scared that everyone is going to keep leaving me.”_

 

She sniffed as her vision became a bit blurry. Wiping her eyes with her sleeve, she kept writing.

 

_“Raven abandoned me, you left me, Blake ran away, Ruby took off to Mistral almost right after she woke up._

 

_Why does everyone leave me? Am I not worth staying for? Am I driving them away? Or am I just destined to end up alone? My chest hurts, Mom.”_

 

A few wet spots appeared on the page as Yang choked out a sob.

 

_“Why did you have to go?_

 

_I miss you, Mom. I miss you so much._

_I love you._

 

_Yang Xiao Long”_

 

She dropped the pencil the moment she finished the last word and silently walked to her bed. Getting under the covers, the blonde buried her head into her pillow and silently wept. It might have been minutes or hours before she stopped, but eventually she finally ran out of tears. She didn’t know why she had written that. And she didn’t feel any better for writing it. All she felt was tired.

 

And cold.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry I'm late. I had this written but life got distracting. I know the letter was a bit sloppy sounding, but that's intentional. She was essentially spilling the thoughts in her head onto the page.  
> This chapter is probably the most personal of this story, so I hope it turned out well.


End file.
